Oh my god.. I can't believe I haven't written anything in so long. I was always so passionate about this whole writing thing. Even though most of what I would write here would just be a way to vent, I still enjoyed doing it. Anyways.. What has happened since my last post?

Well.. My man came to Sweden and stayed for a month. Seeing him at the airport as he got off the plane, running into his arms and kissing him, was the best and most intense feeling I've ever had in my life. I wish I could find the proper words to describe it but its just impossible. I guess that if you've ever been away from somebody that you love with every breath you take, and then seeing them again after all that time.. That feeling.. That incredible feeling! 

After a few days on Swedish ground, he managed to get over his jet lag and we managed to actually leave our love nest and socialize with the world again. On sunny days we tried to spend as much time outdoors as possible. We went on long walks, we enjoyed the Swedish nature and I tried to show him some of the places where I grew up, went to school or worked. At nights we would snuggle up in the couch with some good wine, taking us through all THREE seasons of Game of thrones.. Plus tons of movies. The best part was knowing that I could fall asleep in his arms, and in the morning when I woke up, he would still be there! My man! The best freaking man!! And of course, waking up with him every morning is just like waking up at Christmas! I'm happy and excited! Blessed and grateful! Not only do I get to wake up with him but we also have another amazing day ahead of us to enjoy each other and the joy of being together! What more could I ask for?

I took him on road trips. To the north, to the middle and to the south. And even though my city isn't even close to Stockholm's beauty, I know he appreciated it as much here as he did in Stockholm. We had so many beautiful moments and we made so many beautiful memories! 

On top of that, I got to see one of my dearest friends getting married to her man. Me and my man, got to see her and her man! Oh god, LOVE was everywhere that beautiful day and even though we had some misfortunes, I will always remember the beautiful parts from that day. 

I did my best to keep the tears away that whole day. Right after the wedding though, we had to hit the road again. We had about 4-5 hours on the road to look forward to. I had to drive straight from the wedding to the airport in Stockholm. As we finally got there, we sat and held each other and as soon as I saw the green letters on the screen, telling him to 'go to gate', I couldn't hold those freaking tears back anymore. It was like opening a kitchen faucet. I didn't want him to go. I didn't wanna see him leave. 

Coming home, where everything smelled just like him, where every inch of my house reminded me of him, yet knowing he's not here anymore, broke my heart. Over and over again. It was so awful. I felt so empty. I put on one of his T-shirts and I crawled up in our bed. I was exhausted from all the driving and I just fell apart. I couldn't stop crying. It's sad to think about those awful moments without him. Moments that are causing me so much pain. Actual physical pain. It feels like my heart is being cut out of my chest in the most brutal way! God, I never wanna feel that pain ever again!

That month just flew by so fast.. But we had fun, we made memories, we had good beer and wine and cozy nights at the sauna and snuggly nights on the couch and miles and miles on the road.. And every second with him was A M A Z I N G!!

Now we are 8 days apart. In just 8 days I'll be back in LA and back in his arms. I can't wait!